For the people out there that love driving as much as i do, here is something fun to do…

This works best win there is only one or two other cars around you, I usually do it late at night.
Set your cruise control to about 5 above the speed limit(unless your going to try to send me the ticket when you get one, and then in that case just set it to the speed limit)
And then just drive, and as you pass someone, watch them speed up to prove they are better than you, and then they will slow down because they aren’t paying enough attention to keep a steady speed. then they will speed up again. The whole time, they are having this driving competition with you to prove their dominance… but guess what… all they are proving is that they are idiots.

#yourwelcome from your friends at #grrridiots

Dear feminists who are also bisexual,
You wanted equality for women and you have gotten it (still slightly debatable). But this also means that now when your dating a guy or a girl and decide to hookup with another girl… Your still cheating… Even though I personally support you in this decision… Equal rights equal rules…

Summer on Cape Cod. What does that mean to me?

It means that every single person doing construction loses their mind, and switches from doing overnight work on main arteries to working on BOTH bridges all day during tourist season.




Dear Ladies, if you don’t want pictures of your vagina or panties taken in public… don’t wear clothing that exposes them IN PUBLIC! If i had a hole in my pants near my dick I would expect no less of people to look, stare, comment, and take pictures of it. The same goes with your low cut tops… i don’t see the point of making “upskirts” illegal. If you want to make it illegal to photograph people in public… fine… but don’t go around bitching about WHEN and WHAT you can photograph in public if photography in public is legal. kthnx



The Smell of Desperation







Meanwhile in New Jersey…


Dear diary,
food is sooo cute, why does it have to die for? srsly doe y??

Dear tiny little gremlins that make facebook mobile apps,

You must be tiny little gremlins, because who the F%ck else would think that putting the check-box to invite someone to an event within a millimeter of the scroll bar so that every time I try to check a box, it scrolls down the list was a good idea??

SERIOUSLY PEOPLE… TEST YOUR SH!T before you release it. take it from google… when you want a check box you put it to the LEFT of the persons photo…COMPLETELY opposite the scroll bar… and why do you even have a scroll bar in a mobile app, you don’t need that many facebook friends and its still faster just to flick down the list on a phone. #grrridiots